Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Yes, I Love How I Look Too.

It's so funny, a friend of mine shared this article from Buzzfeed where a woman who agreed with a compliment she received on Tinder and how it pissed the guy off. Why is that? Is it because you encountered a woman who, for once loves who she is, what she is and how she looks? Is it because that a woman who is self-aware is now deemed cocky instead of confident? Either way, it's annoying.


You should think and believe that you look good. You should love your skin, hair, nails, clothes, body and whatever else you wear on that beautiful canvas that God created. Most importantly you shouldn't be apologetic for it. Look, it's simple, if a guy is threatened by your confidence and self love they will lash out at you and come back with a diss to cover up that compliment. It's mainly because that man is scared of a woman who is secure. Which ultimately means that he himself is insecure and wants a doe eyed chick who is in the same boat.

Personally like many of you I've been treated badly because of my confidence. Also because I'm not easily smitten by a comment. This one guy told me that he didn't know how to handle someone who already knew her worth. What? He went on to explain that a majority of girls, when you compliment them they give you a backstory. I laughed because I know plenty of women like that. He then mocked a conversation:

man: you look great
woman: really? man I felt like shit today or ugh thanks I don't think so or stop lying

man to me: you look great today!
me: thanks!

He said my short curt response mixed with happiness and self-awareness of my self-love was refreshing. We went on to have a great date and later down the road we fitted best as friends and nothing romantic. However from time to time, he does hint at wanting to give it another shot, but meh I'm not feeling it.  Now back to the compliments!

I want every woman to learn how to receive a compliment with confidence. It starts by loving yourself and complimenting yourself daily AND believing it! Tell yourself you're gorgeous in the morning, that you look good and that you love those battle scars that we as women gain over the years. You are beautiful, you are loved and you are an amazing goddess! If you need some help, my girl Ashley Graham has a message for you:
<3 Ebony

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Taking a Moment

Where have I been!?

That seems to be the hot topic of the emails and messages I received from my writing hiatus. So to answer your question, I've been taking a moment.

In a place where you're constantly overlooked, talked down on, disrespected and at times fearful for your life you have to take a moment. You have to take a moment to appreciate what's around you. You have to take a moment to remember why you do what you do. You have to take a moment to fall in love with it all over again as if it were your first true love.

For me, I had to take a moment and love myself again. From the people who make it a habit to constantly let me know that I'm nothing, I had to take a moment to rebuild myself. From a certain profession that's slowly sucking the life out of me because of misplaced promises, I had to take a moment to remember that I am worthy of those promises and they will happen one way or another. Also that this is just a stepping stone to my happiness. From the people who are flaky I had to take a moment to remove them from my life. For the God, my papa who keeps on blessing and forgiving me, I had to take a moment to reconnect with him.

I'm doing something that's long overdue, I'm focusing on me and what I want. I'm going after everything that is set before me and letting no one or thing get in the way of that. I have this fire that God placed back in my heart of our original plan. Which ultimately is his plan on my life. At times you have to take a moment to appreciate yourself so that no one else can tear what you built down.

I have something in the works. A plan that I'll be more then happy to share with you when the moment is right. I'm excited for this journey and to share it with you when the time presents itself. Just know that there's a major shift in the atmosphere.

I'll still be taking my moments, and I'm going to write every now and again. Soon my blog will be as popping as it once was. But for now, I need to disconnect so I can reconnect with what truly matters. The voices that need to be heard. The topics that needs to be discussed and what's in my heart. I'll be taking a moment for as long as it takes.

<3 Ebony