Tuesday, July 24, 2012

It Only Takes One

So because of James Holmes who shot up the Colorado movie theater... 3 more men have been arrested because either they want to shoot up a theater or have seen the movie and want to shoot something/someone. In Maine Timothy Courtious was caught speeding and told police something unbelievable! Courtious said he was on his way to shoot up a former co-worker. While police searched Courtious' car they found an AK-47, four handguns, ammunition and news clippings from the Colorado shooting. Why? Well after he saw Dark Knight Rises and the Colorado Shooter of course! So out of ALL the people in the world, this guy chooses the Colorado shooter as his idol?  In good old Los Angeles 52 year old Clark Tabor stood up in the theater and said "I should go off like Colorado! Anybody have a gun?" Tabor was quickly arrested... James Holmes seems to be a hero and superstar for the crazy people of America and probably around the world soon enough. 

The sad thing about James Holmes is that he's not crazy; he's just a man who acted out his fantasy. If he was crazy I doubt he would have planned months ahead to make this happen. If he was truly crazy it wouldn’t have been planned he would've just done it. Looking dazed with crazy hair and out of tune in a court room does make you look insane and justifies why you would try to plead with reason of insanity. BUT I hope the jury is smart enough to see right through the act of "insane" and go off him being normal and should be held accountable for his actions. 

It only takes ONE person to act this way to create complete chaos. It's a shame that A LOT of people are easily influenced.... That's the scary part. 

Friday, July 20, 2012

Weekend Getaways

Happy Friday!!!!! 

As we all know, I try to make my Friday posts a little more light on the eyes. Today is a happy day (not just because it's Friday) but because I woke up with a whole new attitude. Lets just say all God's blessings are being shown to me and I'm grateful.

This weekend is a chance for me to relax, enjoy and think on many things. My little weekend getaway will be just that, out of town and surrounded by fun, my love and no communication aka phone is put away. Want to relax a little? DO something for you this weekend. Go to a movie, get a massage, eat with friends or family and turn off your phone. Be disconnected with the world for a couple hours if not the entire weekend. Get back to you and re-up on energy, you deserve it.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Black Is Beautiful

History taught us that being different was not ok and has had some serious repercussions. Not conforming to a mans ways and views of life resulted in many races to be subdued to slavery. Blacks, Hispanics, Asians and even Whites are among the few stories that are shared and told.  Today I will discuss the views of Black, how some of our own kind think and treat us.

On an Episode of TI and Tiny their little boy Major(5) asked TI "Daddy can I have a white woman?" TI just laughed it off and said you can have any woman you want. Watching another episode of Tiny and Toya they touched on the subject of girls and skin for awhile. Then watching the music videos I only see the light skinned Black girls, Hispanic girls or big butt White girls in the videos cuddled next to the stars.

Even actor Idris Elba from England said he wants his first kid to be mixed because he doesn't want them to have nappy hair and dark skin. I don't know if he knows this but, he is dark himself so there is a 50/50 chance that his kid maybe dark as well. Seeing how he is not mixed himself having a kid with  "good hair" will come in choice of mate.

Lil Wayne has even said " I only f**s with that light skinned because everything darker is ugly" Hence that his new fiance is a model of whatever decent and his daughter is dark just like him. There is an article that a young woman published about Wayne and his friends saying: "I was called back to be a video girl in his shoot for lollipop. I brought my friend because I didn't want to go to the shoot alone. After the three day shoot I got invited to his room to have a party with the other girls and his friends. I agreed to go only if i can bring my friend along. My friend and I headed to his room where we were greeted by his friend and showed in. As my friend stepped in the room Wayne was quick to say: "HELL NO, She can't come in, the darkness has to stay out the room" all his other friends laughed and the ladies and I looked at him with disgust. My friend snapped back and said "I'm lighter than your daughter and you and you have the nerve to talk about dark and ugly?" Wayne replied "Difference is my daughter has money so that makes her beautiful you do not so good bye." Ever since then I haven't listened or bought a Wayne album.

After reading this article that has been re published and posted on many sites with no comment from Wayne's team. It's a shame that these two men will say these things publicly or even think this way. Believe it or not they are role models and little ones look up to them. So if they hear or see their fav star doing or saying something absurd they may follow suit. I'm going to end my star bust outs with these two men and continue with my views.

** Being in Alaska there are definitely black people here along with other races. So going out of state and allowing people to see my ID always brings the question to "there's black people in Alaska? and they look like you?" Put a smile on my face because yes there are black people in Alaska, but even being from here seems like other people are still shocked to see black people here. A friend of mine told me that she was once approached by someone who said" I usually don't like black black girls, but your hot" Now let me tell you this friend is not easily offend but hearing something like this is down right rude. OK you gave your compliment  but it came with a smack in the face to my people. Other women I know dark and light agree on the fact that darker women have it hardest when it comes to the black race in general. We are perceived by others and even our men as not being beautiful. Darker skinned women to ultimately have to work harder than the rest. This is something I will never understand. 

It's sad, I've been told myself that I'm the prettiest black person some guys have seen and even women have said this too. Some people even assume that I'm mixed with something because there is no way I can be 100% black. So here it is what I'm mixed with,  I'm Cro-Indian (from India), Trinidadian, Black,Cherokee  and English but since I have that Black in me, to anyone else it doesn't matter what my nationality is I will always be black. Am I Ashamed? Hell no, I don't have to waste money to make myself look how I would want, worry about ageing weird and saggy because my skin is firm and tight through my family and so much more. Being a minority and achieving my goals gets a way bigger reaction that not being a minority. Why? Because it's unexpected, and I love it when I become that someone that's  UNEXPECTED :)

Men I didn't forget about you :) 

Over time for men, some women thought dark men weren't as sexy as light skinned men. Why? Well dark skinned men were publicized as being mean, woman beaters, drinkers, smokers,people who leave their kids, or have multiple kids. Just look up some old advertisements pertaining to black men, you will most likely find a picture with a dark skinned man. This view that was so public was brainwashing many woman to thinking that dark equals bad. Until about the 80's when Hip Hop started to come alive then in the 90's when for instance Tyrese came out and made dark sexy, strong, smart and so much more. After that the tables flipped, dark was in and light was out. Now a days for women that rule is almost washed out, now it doesn't matter as long as you have a good head on your shoulders. Now don't get me wrong some women still have their preference on what they choose. 

Black is beautiful, and so is every other race out there. At times I try to be color blind but it's so hard when people have on their rose colored glasses and still live like it's the 1920's.  Will this view ever go away? Will the pain caused by many wars be forgotten? Will Hitler's reign ever be left out the books? Will Martin Luther King Jr's speech be erased and never heard of again? Will JFK's murder be overlooked? or will Abraham Lincoln freeing the slaves be brushed off as if it never happened? absolutely not. It's a battle, a thought and a memory that will always live as long as this earth is still rotating and people are still living.

Say what you want, no matter what my nationality is to it's entirety, I'm Black and I think it's  beautiful

Friday, July 13, 2012

The EX That Refuses to Stay That Way...

Girl: I thought we had something?
Boy: Yeah like months ago 
Girl: So are we officially done?
Boy: It's been almost 4 months
Girl: I still have faith in us

It happens to almost all of us who get into a relationship. We are happy seem to be unbreakable and start to make future plans. THEN out of no where and out of our control, there is always an EX Girlfriend/Boyfriend that hasn't given up hope. It starts off by he/she calling or texting  randomly just to say hi, check in, get an update. What happens when your ex finds out about your new beau? That one call or text turns into many more contact attempts, random bumping into each other which leads to the desperate outbursts of wanting them back!!!!!!

My ladies, ugh..... When we see our ex who treated us like a princess but we were being a spoiled brat and let him go. Say he is in shape, hanging with friends, happy and has a pretty new thing on his side.Wanna know what some women do in this case? Usually with the females in this role, they cry, try to bring up how you made them feel so good and what not, try to pry back into your families lives and start conversations with your friends. Trying every route to get back into your life some way or another. Then when you (the male) don't bite on that petty bull crap, what does she do? She turns around and starts saying how independent she is, she never needed you, you were holding her back, and now she happy with someone else. Really? Just two seconds ago you wanted his "Ego"* and now you're pulling a WEBBIE and miss I N D E P E N D E N T*?  Crazy!!!  

Now for our fellas who are wearing this shoe. You see your ex girl, she is happy, smiling that smile you used to put on her face. She is lighting up the room like never before, body is looking good because she didn't let herself go after you let her go and now she has a new man who is strikingly handsome, smart and everything you weren't. What do guys do in this situation? Well they aren't ALL as dramatic as the female route (but some are trust me..) instead they call and text cracking a joke or just saying what's up. Then those calls and texts start to become longer conversations. Guys have a slicker way of getting back into a females life, they have a certain swagg to it. Their patience really kicks in, soon they are in the friend zone and after awhile here they try to dominate as if they are Mufasa. Taking that role of friendship to a whole other level. When the female catches on she soon shuts him out and shows him the door. What happens after this? That female now becomes all kinds of bad names,  all of a sudden that guy now has plenty of women lined up, and it's nothing. Hmmm, now I'm a whore whose no good but yet you were JUST barking up my tree? Nice...

Some people just don't understand that relationships are meant for two! If it didn't work out with you and someone else in the beginning then hell it's not supposed to. Now it's hard to maintain a decent relationship because not only do people post it on Social Networking sites, it's so much easier to manipulate someone else. Draw them away from their current and have them be willing to do certain things. It's now broadcasted! By it I mean SEX! It's everywhere and so easy to get. It's a shame, the one who is worth the fight and scaring off exes will be the one you won't have to worry about. So stop rushing and be patient, he or she will come at the RIGHT time. For all that other drama, if your significant other wants to stray show them the door. 

* "Ego" meaning of the Ego used in Beyonce and Kanye West song. Webbie a  rapper has a hit single called  INDEPENDENT 

Examples used are from previous experience with my exes and watching how some of my friends have reacted with their exes. 

Thursday, July 12, 2012

But I'm Not a Reader.....

Just another good read besides my blog posting :) 

Yes I did write this awesome fictional novel. "A Crooked Smile" is one of a trilogy.Family, friends, love, lies, murder, some adult content and some laughs is only the minor things that's inside this book!! Check it out!!


Wednesday, July 11, 2012

What Happens When The Arguments Stop?

Ahhh, the sole question on what happens when the argument stops... Well ultimately doom. No matter how long you know someone or been with them, you really don't know their thought process especially if the time together is relatively short. People who been together for a short time (doesn't matter if its in a romantic way or in a working way) don't know the other persons true thoughts, feelings, reactions, emotions and so forth. They see the glossy shinny new cover instead of the deep, damaged pages within.

When arguments become the sole base of peoples relationships whether it be with family, work, friends or boyfriend/girlfriend the truth behind the matter isn't what your arguing about. Because having the strength to argue brings emotions and lets the other know that you still care. What matters is when that other person doesn't even want to argue.

Now you don't have to argue ALL the time for this to matter, it could even be in little spurts for this to be a big deal. For instance your doing the dishes fellas and your lady comes in just yelling and nagging about nothing. Usually you'll argue back to figure out what's wrong because us women are so complex you have to ask in order to find out. Instead of asking you let her ramble and get all worked up get loud and stomp around. You continue to do the dishes and she continues to fuss. After 5 minutes or so goes by your thinking "why in the hell is she still going at it?" well that's because you are not responding. When you don't respond whether it be a hey or yell right back, she is going to think that you don't even care. Now ladies if your in this situation, he probably doesn't care. Why? Well because you do it so often it has no effect. Soon your screaming and fussiness will wear off and he will go his separate way.

Another instance, your man always wants to know the goods on you aka where are you, what your doing, who your with and who that person is and what they mean to you. Every time you say hi to another person of the opposite sex say your man asks you "you have sex with him?" or "how you know him?" At first you thought it was plain curiosity and answered. Then as time went by your thinking "damn is this how it's going to be every time?" so then you decide to flip the script, you ask him all the questions he asks you and soon he gets all pissy and starts arguments. Now fellas, don't ask questions you don't want to be asked. Truth is, some people want it their way all the time. Ladies some men don't want you to do what they do, whether it be hanging with your friends, talking to certain people or having fun without them; but when they get that chance themselves some men will take it and run. Why? It's the have your cake and eat it to innuendo. In this instance fellas, if you keep asking your lady questions but never want to answer them yourself and she STOPS answering you and starts ignoring. That is a clear sign to check things out. Why? 8 times out of 10 your lady has already checked out on the situation and probably even you.

Now say you are in the work place, and you have a co worker or even a boss who keeps nagging about a situation that Billy did last week. Say Billy spilled the coffee and didn't clean up his mess. Your co worker or boss might have gotten so mad that they reamed Billy and kept going on about it that entire day. Billy and the other person keep getting into it arguing non stop taking little jabs and trying to outshine each other at work... Can you say Tension???? Now weeks have passed by and every time Billy goes to get coffee that person always makes a remark or comes up to you and talks about him. Wouldn't that irk your nerves? The situation has escalated and now other co workers are being brought in.  In this situation the arguments have brought things to two options 1. if its a co worker that person would get fired because they can't show that they can move on from situations 2. If that was a boss you might think about finding another job because he has traits of immaturity.

After reading all that take away one thing: say what you mean and mean what you say. One argument with someone important can very well be the last.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Struggling Faith


The touchy subject that irks peoples nerves much like politics but in a touchier way. 
There's three types of people:

Saints- Your true believers, the Bible is the book to live by and nothing else. These people usually conform to one group of religion and possibly might think that all other types are insignificant to theirs i.e Christian, Baptist, Catholic and so forth.  OR what Webster says: any of certain persons of exceptional holiness of life, formally recognized as such by the Christian Church, especially by canonization.

Believers-  These group of people are the most common now a days. They believe in God or a higher power and understand that certain preaching's are real and others are kind of harsh. For example: they believe that being LGTB is not a choice verses the Bible which basically says that it is. BUT they still believe in God pray, understand but disagree. Another example, marriage is supposed to be until death does those two people apart. What if they get married and the woman or man is being physically and mentally abused on a daily basis? Divorce would seem like a GREAT way to live your life but then it is a sin.

Meh aka Atheists-  Not much to say here, they don't believe in God instead it's science or "Life just happened" way of thinking.

 Now some may argue that there are many more groups than these three, and you are RIGHT my intelligent grasshopper. These three categories are simply based on what I know and SEE on almost a daily basis. With that being said:

Which category do you fall in?

For those who know me, know that I am NOT ashamed to say what I'm about to say and share my beliefs. Growing up in a very different type of household, my mother is Catholic and my father is Baptist. Coming together they both agreed to allow us (my sister and I) choose our own religion. Both of their religions believe in God but how they go about it is completely different. Sooo!! ahem as I clear my throat and stretch my fingers, here we go into the mind of Ebony. 

What Group do I fall in? 

Meh, I can't lie, I'm a believer but not a saint and no where close to an Atheists. I believe in God, we speak to each other, I confess my sins and express my gratitude. I love him with all my heart and let him know that every day. BUT I don't agree with some things in the Bible and I don't agree with a lot of people in the Church, Divorce, being LG (not the T, because that is a choice you make to go to drastic measure to change your body or the B because that's just a confusion you want your cake and will eat it to, nothing wrong with that; but you're just confused none the less) Respect of elders and attitudes towards others. 

In a world full of hate, I would love if God could come down sometimes and straighten us out. Granted he gave us CHOICE, so what we do with the world is exactly what will come of it. God steps in in the form of our conscience and sends us angels. He's here, that little voice of reason aka that gut feeling that nagging that may represent itself in the form of our parents is God. He helps you make decisions he's there to help you choose right, you just have to trust that he will come and listen to when he does. For those other times when we need him to come down and take away our child murderers and rapists and he doesn't show; does make me mad and sad. All I can do is pray that God called upon them before whatever tragedy took it's course.  

 I don't crack open the Holy Book as much as I should and I don't single myself to a single form of religion and belief because I feel it would be unethical to me. I feel like I am a liar if I do this. Why? Well because I know what I believe, i just stated it above. I love him but some things I don't understand and don't see how it can be a sin. Do I question God? HELL NO! What he says is what he says but I do ask for understanding until that prayer is answered I will continue to be confused. 

 I can't say I'm Christian, Baptist, Catholic etc because I don't follow that life and I don't live up to the expectations. Many people ask me why don't I go to church. To be honest, Church (the building) hasn't found it's way into my heart yet. God and I have church every day. Getting help from others is def needed and at times I do but it's not consistent. 
I sin at times, I curse, think some bad thoughts and at times I wish bad on others (even though I catch myself and apologize) I drink, do some adult activities, I have tattoos, piercings, and scars. ALL of which are considered a sin because God doesn't want you to ruin his temple that he LOANED you. But I've done this anyway, did I know before hand that the tattoos and piercings were a sin?? NOPE not until AFTER The fact. But there is nothing I can do now but accept my choice and live with it.

Will I go to hell? Naw, I'm a believer and I'm sure in my due time I will find a more strict  religious path. As you live life and understand the journeys that are ahead, you're more prone to venture towards to him; I most likely am one of these people. 

A great pastor said this in one sermon: 

"Now a days people get Church confused. The church is the BODY of Christ. The BODY of Christ is us. Our TEMPLE is his BODY, our BODY is his BODY therefore we are his TEMPLE and the CHURCH is installed within us. We don't have to be in a fancy building, fine suits with tons of money to have Church. We can have it outside and STILL receive the SAME blessings! Don't let the modern world discourage you. Believe in what GOD has in YOU his CHURCH." 

So with that being said.... Religion.... it brings forth so many ideas, emotions, thoughts, feelings and in the end most people believe in God or a higher power. My thing is, just be right. Be courteous to those around you, smile, don't commit petty crimes and think with bad thoughts and act on them. Life is short, doesn't matter what or who you believe in, everyone answers to someone. 

Disagree if you may on anything in this article, we are all entitled to our own opinions. If you are offended by what I said or what I believe, sorry you think with such a narrow mind. 

Monday, July 9, 2012

Monday aka that 2:30 Feeling All Day

Here we are once again.....it's another Monday!! We all might hate this day because it's the blame for the ending of our weekend and the beginning of yet another work filled week. Not sure about you but I hit my snooze button about 20 times, and was almost very later to work :-/.... Why is that?? Mondays are the doom days and prayer for hump day to come soon enough to rescue us from this work week and bring on our weekend!!

How do you get over your Monday feeling? Sip tons of coffee? Stare at the clock? Smile and pretend like you love Mondays and are so excited to go to work!? or do you sit in your chair pout? Well fellow readers I have mastered the fine art of sleeping with your eyes open while being alert. Yes at the same time. I may be present and eyes will be wide, smile will be plastered on my face BUT some days I am checked out for a few minutes to catch up on that extra 5 minutes of sleep that I missed ( don't judge there is nothing wrong with that :D) Think of it this way, Mondays are always the longest days and seem to never want to end, BUT when it does end the rest of the week will come fast!!

Today's blog isn't about anything to important, just a WAKE UP READ for you awesome readers! Tomorrow's blog should and probably will have more to it :)

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Don't Let Them Ruin Your Party

We all have those days when life is great, your job is running smooth, the fam bam is alright and your significant other is being perfectly amazing. THEN we run into that ONE person whose main purpose for the day is to be mean and an ass because they slept on the wrong side of the bed that morning.

So here you come, skipping into work saying hi, smiling, happy, you have that Friday feeling going on when SHA BAM! You're smacked in the face with that Debbie Downer co worker whose sitting at the table, playing words with friends, drinking coffee, and complaining about the sun being to bright. You try your best to stay positive and keep speaking highly and smiling, but he continues to make your day suck just because he wants to. Now that smiley party you had looks more like this ------------------------->

Being a sad pug is no fun at all! What happened to your party?? Don't let the others take that balloon blowing, helium sucking fun having feeling away!

 Here's what you do:

Tell them to talk to the hand, or you can do what I do, and pretend to listen and care but really I'm in my own world. If you haven't noticed,  it's a known fact that other people don't like to see others happy when they feel like shit. In some peoples mind the world does revolve around them, and when it doesn't they aren't so happy.  Life is to dang short to worry, stress, be sad, mad, angry whatever! Life is to short to be anything but appreciative and happy that you are alive. This is easier to say than to do. I have my times to where someone just pisses me off to the T and I want to do some really mean things! I sit and marinate on what I would like to do and say to this lovely individual, but then I quickly come to realize that their life probably sucks. Why else would someone want to poop on your parade? Happy people with something great going for them at the moment wont waste their time. BUT the ones who aren't in that position at that moment, will be more than happy to pop your balloon. 

So POO on you Party Poopers! I'd rather have a party by myself and be the happiest person ever than have a party and invite one lame that can ruin it. :) Smile